The unspoken impact of the “ick.” From a particular way of talking to an odd mannerism, little eccentricities have always had the ability to put us off our fellow humans. A younger generation of women, however, has put a new name to that feeling — now known as the “ick” — spawning a discourse that may be harming young men’s mental health, The Telegraph reports.

What is the “ick”? Originating as a slang term in the UK, the “ick” describes feelings of repulsion toward specific — and usually pretty trivial — behaviors exhibited by the opposite gender, mostly young men. While the largely women-dominated discussions around the “ick” can be relatively harmless, the discourse has been known to take on a mocking tone, complete with social media “ick” lists highlighting things as banal as drinking milk or running for the bus.

Experts say this language can cause a lot of anxiety for young men: The “ick” offers the “kind of language that can cause men and young boys to really lose self-worth,” UK men’s mental health charity founder Dan Somers told the outlet. The level of granular detail that goes into describing “icks” can have the effect of making young men feel as if everything they do is being judged, prompting them to “become more battle hardened,” Somers explained.

But this isn’t a simple story of girls heaping scorn on boys. Rather than a case of young women actively trying to bully young men, the harsher elements of “ick” culture are often fuelled by girls seeking a defence mechanism against the bad behavior of their male counterparts, London-based therapist Charlotte Melki told the Telegraph. This is especially critical as young women face intense scrutiny about their appearance, high rates of sexual harassment and assault, and institutionalized sexism across social media, academic institutions, and the workplace from a very early age.

The “ick” may even have its upsides: “Ick” discourse may reflect a growing sense of agency within women’s relationships with young men, since it provides women a way of identifying and describing a strong gut reaction to a male counterpart’s behavior or values. Being able to name what puts one off someone else — and seeing other women do the same — could index a greater degree of “trusting your gut” among young women, a critical skill for choosing reliable and responsible life partners.

Still, the triviality of many common “icks” makes it hard to champion the discourse as purely a move toward female empowerment. Indeed, some experts believe that the “ick” really just indexes our deep dissatisfaction with…ourselves. “The ick is a projection of our own shame, through criticism,” psychotherapist Jo Nicholl told The Guardian. At the end of the day, if there are a thousand ways to be lame, you’re probably lame too.

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