{"id":650149,"date":"2017-03-17T08:37:38","date_gmt":"2017-03-17T08:37:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2017\/03\/17\/the-best-investment-disclaimer-weve-ever-read\/"},"modified":"2017-03-17T08:37:38","modified_gmt":"2017-03-17T08:37:38","slug":"the-best-investment-disclaimer-weve-ever-read","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2017\/03\/17\/the-best-investment-disclaimer-weve-ever-read\/","title":{"rendered":"The best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>This is the best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read \u2014 and it will make you <\/strong><strong>chuckle, at the very least:<\/strong> \u201cFirst of all, stock prices are volatile. Well, duh. If you buy shares in a stock mutual fund, any stock mutual fund, your investment value will change every day. In a recession it will go down, day after day, week after week, month after month, until you are ready to tear your hair out, unless you've already gone bald from worry. <strong>It will insist on this even if Ghandi, Jefferson, John Lennon, Jesus and the Apostles, Einstein, Merlin and Golda Maier all manage the thing.<\/strong> Stock markets show remarkably little respect for people or their reputations. Furthermore, if the fund has really been successful, you might be buying someone else's whopping gains when you invest, on which you may have to pay taxes for returns you didn't earn. Just try and find somewhere you don't, though. Dismal.\u201d <a href=\"https:\/\/web.archive.org\/web\/19990129003817\/http:\/www.ipsfunds.com\/risks.html\">Tap or click here to read the rest of it on the Internet Archive Wayback Machine<\/a> or read this <a href=\"http:\/\/blogs.wsj.com\/moneybeat\/2017\/03\/10\/best-mutual-fund-disclosure-ever-dont-come-crying-to-us-if-we-lose-all-your-money\/\">Wall Street Journal<\/a> story, that on the back story and what happened to the author.<\/p>\n<p><strong>The conclusion:<\/strong> \u201cJust so you know. Don't come crying to us if we lose all your money, and you wind up a Dumpster Dude or a Basket Lady rooting for aluminum cans in your old age.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This is the best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read \u2014 and it will make you chuckle, at the very least: \u201cFirst of all, stock prices are volatile. Well, duh. If you buy shares in a stock mutual fund, any stock mutual fund, your investment value will change every day. In a recession it will go [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"single-feature.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"newspack_ads_suppress_ads":false,"newspack_popups_has_disabled_popups":false,"newspack_sponsor_sponsorship_scope":"","newspack_sponsor_native_byline_display":"inherit","newspack_sponsor_native_category_display":"inherit","newspack_sponsor_underwriter_style":"inherit","newspack_sponsor_underwriter_placement":"inherit","ep_exclude_from_search":false,"_primary_brand":0,"newspack_featured_image_position":"","newspack_post_subtitle":"","newspack_article_summary_title":"Overview:","newspack_article_summary":"","newspack_hide_updated_date":false,"newspack_show_updated_date":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[12012],"tags":[72,2380,12011,12010],"brand":[],"newspack_spnsrs_tax":[],"class_list":["post-650149","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-speed-round-the-weekend-edition","tag-enterpriseam","tag-speed-round","tag-speed-round-the-weekend-edition","tag-the-weekend-edition","wpautop","entry"],"acf":{"mongo_id":"330f488a-244d-44b7-b01f-c5baf3d9354d","order":"0","is_powered_by":true,"section_story_id":"58b48825-146b-47bc-b694-de65c5baaf05","story_type":"1","photo_url":"","photo_position":"above","related_issue":[650141],"teaser":"","voice_url":""},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.1 (Yoast SEO v27.1.1) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read - EnterpriseAM Egypt<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2017\/03\/17\/the-best-investment-disclaimer-weve-ever-read\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"This is the best investment disclaimer we\u2019ve ever read \u2014 and it will make you chuckle, at the very least: \u201cFirst of all, stock prices are volatile. 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Badran did not disclose the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Speed Round&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Speed Round","link":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/category\/speed-round\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ent.news\/internal\/536550.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":648612,"url":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2017\/04\/07\/business-dramas-wall-street-stool-pigeons-and-samsungs-quest-for-redemption\/","url_meta":{"origin":650149,"position":1},"title":"Business Dramas: Wall Street stool pigeons and Samsung\u2019s quest for redemption","author":"enterpriseam admin","date":"7 April 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"The best business drama we\u2019ve read in a long time is Bloomberg\u2019s recent take on the story of Guy Gentile, which it dubs \u201cthe Wall Street informant who double-crossed the FBI.\u201d Gentile\u2019s story isn\u2019t as rare as you think: \u201cHe became one of the FBI\u2019s 15,000 informants, or \u2018confidential human\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;SPEED ROUND, THE WEEKEND EDITION&quot;","block_context":{"text":"SPEED ROUND, THE WEEKEND EDITION","link":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/category\/speed-round-the-weekend-edition\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ent.news\/internal\/536550.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":575788,"url":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2020\/10\/27\/azimuts-inaugural-egypt-bond-fund-sees-huge-investor-demand\/","url_meta":{"origin":650149,"position":2},"title":"Azimut\u2019s inaugural Egypt bond fund sees huge investor demand","author":"enterpriseam admin","date":"27 October 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"INVESTMENT WATCH- Azimut\u2019s inaugural Egypt bond fund sees huge investor demand: Azimut\u2019s new Egypt-focused fixed-income fund AZ-Savings was 6x oversubscribed in the nine-day private placement that ended on 21 October, Al Mal reports, citing a company statement. The Italy-based asset manager secured EGP 295.3 mn from over 100 investors, prompting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Speed Round&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Speed Round","link":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/category\/speed-round\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ent.news\/internal\/536550.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":597589,"url":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2019\/07\/31\/mena-fund-managers-are-keeping-their-egypt-investments-unchanged-for-now\/","url_meta":{"origin":650149,"position":3},"title":"MENA fund managers are keeping their Egypt investments unchanged for now","author":"enterpriseam admin","date":"31 July 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"MENA-based fund managers are keeping their allocations to Egypt unchanged over the next period, according to a Reuters poll. The last poll from the newswire published at the end of last month had indicated that over a quarter of fund managers planned to increase their exposure to Egypt over the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Speed Round&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Speed Round","link":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/category\/speed-round\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/ent.news\/internal\/536550.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":573882,"url":"https:\/\/enterpriseam.com\/egypt\/2020\/08\/23\/egyptian-stock-trading-platform-thndr-receives-brokerage-license\/","url_meta":{"origin":650149,"position":4},"title":"Egyptian stock trading platform Thndr receives brokerage license","author":"enterpriseam admin","date":"23 August 2020","format":false,"excerpt":"STARTUP WATCH- Cairo-based investment platform Thndrwas awarded Egypt\u2019s first new brokerage license since 2008, according to a company statement (pdf). 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